Friends?

It was a rainy night.

I was lying still, wide awake.

Waiting for the inevitable as a storm approaches.

Slowly tears began to fall, without minding them I continue to stay still. Thinking what might happen tomorrow. What might happen that may change me forever?

I realized, I was happy. However, being happy does not mean that I have no more pains. I realized that the pain I hide in my smile is the one thing that the people around me want to see. I may have lost some friends but maybe because its for the better. Somehow God showed me the toxicity of having being too attached to people you haven't really known and being the one who pleases every time.

I'm not a person to want rich, sophisticated friends. I just want friends who'll stand by me through the storm. Friends who will listen and understand, not the ones who want to be understood without giving the same favor. Friends who will ignore the petty things and understand you for the bigger picture. Friends who will not look at you like you are estranged because of a mistake but rather friends who will hold up their hands and lend their ears for what you are about to explain.

Most of all, friends who will respect you. Maybe not for being within a certain circumstance, but for you as a whole, as a person with feelings.

I was so caught up looking at them that I forgot other people who was caring for me and was listening. No matter how hard I rant, they end up comforting me and still not judging me for how other people see me.

Nobody ever saw this coming, but maybe this is destiny working. Trying to toughen up broken pieces by breaking it more and giving people to fix it. We don't choose the people who we come across in our lives, but we choose who stays.

We can never be perfect but we can have friends who will see us as who we are and accept us for that.

Those who matter won't mind and those who mind won't matter.